The brave may not live forever but the cautious do not live at all

“The brave may not live forever but the cautious do not live at all” – Sir Richard Branson

Did you know that we are born with only two fears? As babies we are only scared of falling (and therefore no longer being cradled in our mother’s arms) and loud noises. Everything else is learned. When you consider this, it is almost too hard to comprehend the magnitude of negative based learning that we have each absorbed unawares through the course of our lives.

In a parenting workshop I recently heard a mother lament how her two-year-old son was saying ‘No’ to everything, even when it didn’t make sense. As the discussion unfolded the realization that if a child’s primary opportunity for learning is from their parent/s then the key reason he was so often saying ‘No’ was because this is what he was so frequently receiving. Of course often as a parent our ‘No’s’ are well meaning. ‘No! Don’t jump out of that tree expecting to fly!’ or ‘No! Don’t put your hand on the hotplate to see what hot feels like!’ The balance between doing our best to love, educate and keep our children safe and unwittingly promoting fear in them is a delicate and difficult one.